I see some thoughts here of the style "don't like our way, go fork the project then". I must say, this is similar to "you can go be an asshole somewhere else, just accept our CoC here" or other such terms. I know these are sort of cultural idioms and all, but they really bug me.

I think: "no, don't be an asshole anywhere!" and "we welcome constructive and respectful criticism, and we'll discuss your concerns; we'd rather you *not* fork our project, even though you are free to".

In other words, we can acknowledge freedoms without even half-way endorsing the actions. "Don't like it, go do your own thing" is a cop-out way to dismiss people and has an undercurrent of "fragmentation and community-break-down is okay". Just like old sayings about "words can never hurt me" are wrong, so is "it's fine for you to go fork the project". If someone is a jerk/troll/etc, I would like them, ideally, to learn and improve, and if not, I want them to stop posting or acting on this or anything, I don't *want* them to fork, except that it's better than continuing to be a troublemaker.